Unstable Read online

  Stacks of ones, fives, tens, and twenties filled each slot. The ends curled, taunting Eli to count each one. His bottom lip stung, once again reminding him how chapped his lips had become. Tomorrow night, he’d be back out on his ass in the cold. Last winter, his lips had cracked and bled. Eli had thought they’d never heal. This year would be the same. A horrible idea sneaked its way inside Eli’s brain. He could borrow a few bucks—just enough to get by. His eighteenth birthday was in two weeks or so. He’d be free from the fear of being forced back home. For once, he could start a real search for a job. A life. The comfy brown couch called his name from the other room. Tonight was only one night, he reminded himself. There would be lots of cold tomorrows.

  He cast a desperate look around the room, searching for answers. Moral dilemmas were new to him. This was a big one. Jimmy was nice. If Eli took this money, he might not choose to be nice ever again. Eli would ruin something untainted. His gaze landed on a small red light in the upper corner of the room. Horror chilled Eli’s blood as realization dawned. It was a camera. No matter what Eli decided, Jimmy would see this footage and know Eli for the scum he was. The instant the man had left Eli alone, he’d gone straight for the cash register. He’d already ruined Jimmy’s act of kindness.

  In a rush, he grabbed the stacks of bills, leaving nothing behind. He checked beneath the drawer, finding a couple hundred-dollar bills. Leaving the register open wide, Eli headed for the back. First, he found a pen and paper, and scratched out a quick I-owe-you to Jimmy before going on a clothing hunt. A thick down jacket hung on a rack by the door. Eli crammed his arms inside. He found clean socks in Jimmy’s desk—of all places—and a pair of gloves in a box marked as lost and found.

  As he headed for the back door, Eli cast a quick glance around the room. He didn’t want to miss anything, since he was already all in. His gaze landed on the blanket on the couch. He grabbed it too for good measure. Cold air blasted Eli in the face as he opened the back door. He almost reconsidered. It wasn’t too late. He could put everything back where he’d found it. Possibly, Jimmy might never look at that surveillance footage. The blaring of the security alarm got Eli moving. He’d forgotten that part. Without looking back, he took off running into the night—just as he’d done the night he’d left home.

  Chapter 2

  Three years later…

  No good bastard. That’s what Jace had called him before attempting to knee him in the balls. In truth, Jimmy was shocked Jace had hung around as long as he had. Every filthy name the man had tossed in Jimmy’s face was the truth. He couldn’t blame Jace for breaking things off between them. That didn’t mean Jimmy had stay sober over it. Too bad a liter of Jack and a fifth of Crown did nothing to squelch his headache. The pounding behind his eyes felt closer to a stroke and warned of a monster hangover. All the more reason not to sober up and grab a six-pack.

  There was a banging coming from somewhere. At first, Jimmy thought the pounding in his head had moved to his ears before his gaze landed on the back door. After pushing to his feet, Jimmy stumbled for the door. If there was a God in Heaven, it wouldn’t be Jace on the other side. The last thing he needed was another black mark against him in Jace’s book of hate. In spite of his hope, Jimmy had no clue who else would bang down the back door of his bar at three in the morning.

  He tried smoothing out the wrinkles in his shirt. Giving up, he ran his fingers through his hair, hoping it wasn’t too bad. That was a lost cause. Fuck it. Jace hated him too much to care. He pushed the door open and froze. In his current state, it didn’t take much to lock down his brain. Finding a stranger on his stoop proved too much for the liquor-soaked organ living inside his head.

  “Hey, Jimmy.”

  The stranger knew his name. “Um. Hey.”

  As if he found Jimmy’s confusion humorous, the man smiled. “May I come in?”

  Jimmy chewed on the inside of his cheek, mulling things over. The dude didn’t look dangerous or crazy, but neither did Jimmy, and he was both. He took a step back. Jimmy eyed the man as he passed. He was small—maybe only five-eight. His hair was a dark, choppy mess, as if he didn’t get it cut or comb it often. Considering the package and Jimmy’s lack of memory, he could only assume they’d slept together.

  He closed the door. The man turned. He inspected the stranger’s features in the light. He was young—way too young for Jimmy’s tastes. His mind whirled again. No way had they slept together.

  “I’d offer you a beer, but I get the feeling you’re not legal.”

  The man’s smile grew. “You have no idea who I am, do you?”

  Jimmy shrugged. “If you’re about to claim you’re my kid or some shit, you can save it. Not only do I not chase women, I never have.”

  His nighttime visitor’s expression transformed. The smile fell. Something unnamed flashed in his eyes, disappearing before Jimmy could grasp it. “Um.” The man shifted from foot to foot, looking more uncomfortable by the moment. “I have to admit, I wasn’t expecting you not to remember. You took me in about three years ago.”

  Memories flooded Jimmy’s brain. This was the homeless kid? “Eli?”

  He nodded.

  A growl rose in Jimmy’s throat. “I should toss your ass in the street. You’re a brave little fucker, showing your face around here after stealing a solid grand from me.”

  Eli didn’t back down. It was a point in his favor. “That’s why I’m here.”

  Jimmy’s eyebrows hit his hairline at the claim. “What? Was a grand not enough? Are you back for more?”

  The kid’s expression never wavered. “No.”

  His head spun. “Fuck. I’m too tired to care,” Jimmy said, moving for the couch. In an odd way, he was glad to see Eli. More times than he could count, Jimmy had thought of the skinny homeless kid he’d pulled out of the trash and wondered if he was okay. Now, here he was—clean and healthy looking.

  After dropping down on one end of the couch, he motioned Eli toward the other. “If you’re not here to steal more money from me, why are you here?” Jimmy asked as Eli crossed the room and sat.

  “I’ve been working at Hollow Edge. It’s a clothing store in the mall,” Eli explained instead of answering. “It’s thanks to the money I stole from you, actually.”

  Jimmy blinked at him in confusion. “Okay.”

  Undeterred by the sarcasm dripping from Jimmy’s voice, Eli continued. “No one had ever been nice to me before you,” Eli said, sounding sad.

  Jimmy was—for the most part—unmoved. “So you repaid me by stealing from me. Makes sense. That’s pretty par for the course in my life. Go on.”

  Eli eyed him in silence for a moment before digging an envelope out of his back pocket and holding it out to Jimmy. “It’s taken me three years of saving a little at a time, but here’s the money I took.”

  Jimmy stared at the worn-looking envelope. He couldn’t bring himself to reach for it. When he didn’t take it, Eli set it on the cushion between them.

  “I’m sorry it took me so long. Between paying the rent on my room, buying food, and all that, it’s been a struggle.” He held Jimmy’s gaze without blinking. “But even if it had taken me a hundred years, I’d always planned to pay you back.”

  Jimmy swallowed past his rapidly drying throat. He was used to dealing with the dregs of the universe. This was different. He tried speaking but only managed one word. “Why?”

  Eli’s face hardened. “I’m no thief.”

  “No,” Jimmy said, realizing Eli misunderstood. “Why did you steal from me in the first place? If you’d asked, I would’ve given you the money.” The funny thing was—Jimmy meant it. When he’d pulled the scraggly kid from the trash, he’d been… moved. He couldn’t explain it, but Jimmy knew he would’ve helped Eli if the boy had asked.

  Eli looked away. His cheeks reddened. Jimmy regretted the question. Before he could tell Eli not to answer, Eli opened his mouth and wiped Jimmy’s mind. “I’d never had anyone as sexy as you do a damn thing for me. Espe
cially not for free.” Jimmy spent a moment wondering who he should kill, but Eli kept talking. “I took the money and rented a room at the Pay-by-Week over on 8th. Then I got a pre-paid phone and some clothes before heading out to pepper the town with applications. It was hard,” Eli said, as if admitting a dirty secret. “A grand doesn’t go far, even when you’re like me and used to having nothing at all.” He held Jimmy’s gaze. “Luckily, Hollow Edge called and offered me a job before I ran through all the money. I’ve limped by, but I always intended to pay you back.”

  Jimmy shifted to his feet and headed for the door. He held it open for Eli. “I don’t want it.”

  Eli eyed the open doorway but didn’t budge.

  Jimmy massaged the ache at his temples that hadn’t ebbed with Eli’s arrival. “Look, kid.”

  “I’m twenty.”

  “And I’m thirty-two,” Jimmy shot back. “So, kid, I’m glad I was able to help you out. As I said earlier, I would’ve given you the money if you’d asked. No harm. No foul. Take your savings and hang on to it for a rainy day. Now, if you don’t mind, I was in the middle of drinking myself into an early grave when you arrived. I’d like to get back to it.”

  Still, Eli didn’t budge. “Every day is a rainy day for me. I get the feeling every day is a new opportunity to drink yourself into an early grave for you. So, if you don’t mind, I’d like to stay and convince you to keep the money.”

  Jimmy shook his head. “I’m not keeping that money.”

  “Then I’m not leaving,” Eli shot back, looking damnably calm for someone who was about to go ass over teakettle into the street.

  Jimmy slammed the door shut. “Suit yourself,” he growled as he headed for the six-pack he’d forgotten on the desk. He popped one open and chugged half before facing Eli again. “Why is this so important to you? If someone told me I didn’t owe them shit, I wouldn’t owe them shit.”

  “I need to know we’re square.”

  Jimmy’s brows drew together. “Why?” He took a step in Eli’s direction. The room spun. Eli shot to his feet, steadying Jimmy before he hit the floor. Eli’s face was inches from Jimmy’s. He had a smattering of freckles across the bridge of his nose. He looked young. Innocent. His eyes were a shade of light green Jimmy had never seen before. Not only were they amazing, they were also focused on Jimmy’s mouth. It only seemed fair for Jimmy to drop his gaze to Eli’s lips. The kid was pretty. “Thanks,” Jimmy muttered, pulling out of Eli’s hold. “Didn’t think I’d gotten that far into my cups yet. Hopefully, this next beer will put me over the edge.” He took a step back, intent on grabbing another drink. Eli took a step forward, refusing to allow Jimmy to put space between them.

  “Don’t you think you’ve had enough?”

  No one had challenged him in a long time. His blood sang. He popped the tab on another beer, daring Eli with his gaze to say something else. Before he could lift the can to his lips, Eli snagged the can and held it behind his back. If Jimmy had been sober, there was no way Eli would’ve pulled off taking away his alcohol. In his drunken state, Jimmy made a huge mistake. He went after it. After closing the gap between them, he reached behind Eli’s back, intent on reclaiming his drink. The instant their bodies collided, Jimmy’s flared to life in a way it hadn’t in years. Guilt snaked in. This child didn’t need a grown man pawing at him. He was such an ass. The smell of burning rubber from Jace’s tires, as he’d raced from Jimmy’s life, hadn’t yet dissipated. Jimmy’s body was already on fire from someone else’s touch—like it had never been for Jace.

  “I’m with someone.” Before the words finished leaving his lips, Jimmy wanted them back. What an obnoxious, egomaniacally ass he was to assume Eli’s body had reacted the same as his.

  Eli didn’t pull from his hold. “What’s his name?”

  “Jace.”

  “Sounds sweet.”

  At the observation, Jimmy took a step back, giving up on his drink. “I guess I’ve had enough after all.”

  Eli set the beer on the desk. His expression sat on Jimmy’s chest, making it hard for him to breathe. He imagined the man would look the same if Jimmy punched him.

  “Sorry. You’re a grown man. I shouldn’t have…” He ran his hand through his dark hair, leaving it standing on end. He squared his shoulders and met Jimmy’s stare. “Thank you for everything you did for me. I’ll leave you—”

  Jimmy kissed him. God help him. He couldn’t resist. There was this itch beneath his skin. He couldn’t let this man get away without one taste. If Jimmy never saw Eli again, he’d wonder for the rest of his life. The reaction he’d experienced when their bodies touched had nothing on their lips meeting. Air rushed from Jimmy’s lungs and didn’t reappear. It was the most innocent kiss Jimmy had ever experienced, and still, it was also the hottest. Neither of them sought to deepen the kiss. Their tongues didn’t meet. Jimmy stood, hands at his sides, with Eli’s bottom lip held between his. He’d never been more afraid of tainting someone in his life.

  The back door flew open. The trance holding Jimmy enthralled slowly slipped away at the sight of Jace filling the doorway. Horror overcame him. Jace stood with a stack of clothes in his arms, staring at Jimmy with a level of hatred he’d never seen the man show. His normally sweet brown eyes flashed with anger as he took in the situation.

  “Wow. Seducing a teenager in the back room of a bar—classy. I shouldn’t be surprised.” He tossed the clothes in Jimmy’s direction. “I found these while cleaning out my car. They’re yours.” His gaze slid Eli’s way. Jimmy fought the urge to place his body between the two men. Eli wasn’t the one at fault here. “He’ll destroy your life,” Jace promised before turning away and leaving the back door standing open. Jimmy blinked at the open doorway, unsure of what to do. Jace had broken up with him. He didn’t owe the man anything. The knowledge didn’t stop him from feeling like the biggest dick on the planet. Jimmy’s gaze slid Eli’s way. His face was free of all emotion, but his eyes burned.

  His gaze collided with Jimmy’s. “Jace?”

  Jimmy nodded.

  Eli’s gaze hit the ceiling and he blew out a long breath. “I am such a loser.” Without a backward glance or giving Jimmy time to think of a response, Eli stepped around Jimmy and escaped out the open door. Jimmy cast a desperate glance around the room, trying to decide what had just happened. His gaze landed on a worn-looking envelope on the couch.

  “Fuck.” The kid had left the money.

  *

  Eli kept an eye on two teenage boys who looked to be around fourteen. He had a bad feeling they were talking each other into pocketing some merchandise. They glanced his way and caught him watching them. Both boys took off out the door. An inner sigh rang through Eli’s head. Had he ever been that young? In all honesty, Eli didn’t think he’d ever been young—period. Tonight, he felt especially old. Working at Hollow Edge was the best his life would ever be. He couldn’t afford to do more. Hell, he couldn’t even afford dinner. The thought had him glancing at the clock on his register.

  “It’s time for my lunch break,” Eli said, letting his co-worker, Alisha, know he was heading out before grabbing his coat from underneath the register. They were too dead tonight for anyone to make a fuss.

  “Good. I’m right on time.”

  Eli froze at the familiar voice. Alisha’s eyes widened as her gaze slid over Eli’s shoulder. He knew exactly what she was seeing—over six feet of delicious god. The long blond hair. The blue eyes. Eli’s stomach growled. The solid muscles. He swallowed past the lust burning in his throat and turned. Jimmy looked every bit as sexy as Eli pictured every night when he closed his eyes.

  “Don’t you have a bar to run?”

  “It has a good manager,” Jimmy said. His gaze slipped down Eli’s body as he made the claim. Eli stood still for the inspection, wishing he didn’t feel quite so lacking while standing next to Jimmy. “How long do you get for dinner?” Jimmy asked, meeting Eli’s gaze once more.

  Eli licked his lips. There was no escape.
“Thirty minutes.”

  “Guess we’d better hurry, then.”

  Without thought, he stepped around the register, moving closer to Jimmy. His feet didn’t care that his brain was scared shitless. They were headed where his body wanted to be—with his sexy savior.

  “How did you know where to find me?”

  A dark-sounding chuckle rumbled from Jimmy’s chest at Eli’s question. “You told me where you work last night. I took a chance you’d be here.”

  “I’m surprised you remember anything from last night,” Eli admitted as he fell into step beside Jimmy. He had no idea where they were headed nor did he care. They could circle the mall all night. Jimmy could lead him into hell. It didn’t matter at all.

  “Never in my life have I been so drunk I don’t remember anything.” He cast a sideways look at Eli. “Don’t ever believe a man if he claims different.”

  “What about tonight?”

  “What about it?” Jimmy asked, sounding only mildly curious.

  “Are you sober now?”

  “Ish,” Jimmy answered, heading for the food court. “What are you in the mood for?”

  Such a loaded question coming from such a sexy man, it hurt Eli’s chest. “It doesn’t matter. I can’t afford to eat.” Damn, he hated saying those words. His pride stung, but he couldn’t make money appear that didn’t exist.

  “Don’t think I asked you about money. I asked what you’re in the mood for.”

  His ego wouldn’t withstand the blow. “I’m not hungry.”

  The low and long sigh escaping Jimmy had Eli biting back a chuckle. “How about we sit in my truck instead? I think we need to talk.”

  Eli was so damn glad not to be on the spot over the food, he was willing to discuss whatever Jimmy wanted, even that kiss gone wrong. Not to mention, sitting alone with this man in the dark sounded like freaking heaven to him. “Sure.”